The Toxic People That Bring Us Down ...

Recently I tried to erase someone out of my life in every way that was possible to me. After I went through and deleted almost one hundred people off my Facebook page I realized I was a happier person and then finally this one person crossed a line with me for the last time. I deleted her from every aspect of my life I possibly can and I refuse to interact with her unless I absolutely have to. Amazingly, it seems like once I got rid of all that toxicity, all that negativity I felt better about life in general. ... but ... I still feel the need to do the cathartic thing and get rid of it all, so here it goes.

I have written a few blogs about the Lemon Man's aunt, mostly on my old blog, but I brought one here for back story. Then there was the whole part where she let a fourteen year old bring drugs with her to our family vacation.

But there's more to it than all that ...

The first time I knew she had burned me was a long time ago, when I first met her. This was back when the Lemon Man and I were still defining our relationship. Which as corny as it may sound, was a lot like Matthew McConaughy and Jennifer Garner in Ghosts of Girlfriends Past. It was there, it was always there, but he had things that he wasn't sure about, and honestly a single mom with three kids isn't exactly a bachelor's first choice. There was an "us" there just wasn't a defined, legal definition "us." Anyway, there was this nurse ... this nurse that took care of the Lemon Man's grandma after her horrible accident,

Deleting Out the Cruelty ... Killing the Judgment ...

I know better than to think that I can change people ... I don't think I can.

Sometimes, though, I bite when given the opportunity to debate something that obviously isn't worth my time, effort or energy. I was highly inspired by Aubrey at Way Too Much Aubrey a few months ago and her post/rant about judgment of those who receive help and subsidies from the government. I have fought that battle myself with people in the Facebook world, and occasionally in person.

I remember sitting around the Thanksgiving dinner table with my family when I was 19. I was in the middle of my sophomore year of college and I was taking a core-required Black History class. I had always been liberal, always believed in feeding, clothing and sheltering the poor, but that class changed me. It wasn't about race, it was about people being told "you're not allowed to have children because you're poor," and then refusing to help them with birth control or abortions or even adoptions. It was about people being treated like second class citizens because of their economic background, not their skin color.

Back to my Thanksgiving dinner table ...

A discussion started because they asked how school was going, and I listened to my grandparents, my aunt, and one of my cousins all lay into me about how all poor people

What I Meant to Say Was ...

So ... when you decided to be a total and complete asshole and comment on my status on Facebook ... I responded ... but in a nice way ...

I'm glad that you decided that my completely innocent post that had nothing to do with you or your job became your place to decide that you would throw out your superiority ... your casting of inferiority on the rest of the American population ...

Don't get me wrong ... I'm thankful for what you do ... freedom isn't free and men and women that are all over the world doing it are all deserving of thanks and honor ... and you are far from my only friend that is currently doing it ... far from the only person I know that has been there ... and definitely not the one with the worst story to tell ...

What I meant to say when I commented back was ...

It's a good thing you and your family never needed help from us inferior healthcare workers